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bihet feminism lite, you credulous troglodytes
Posts tagged "rape culture"





our culture is so fucked up that necrophilia carries more of a social taboo than rape.




NO ONE’S GETTING HURT (except the necrophile if they… contract something)

i don’t know how to respond to this other than to say…why are you so excited about defending necrophilia?

……………………….you literally made the first post and i was agreeing with you?

like i said, necrophila is gross and disrespectful to the body but like

it’s not some horrific thing like rape, pedophilia, or murder

i just get pissed that people say it’s WORSE than someone living being ACTUALLY HURT

i’m glad that your response to me agreeing with you is to imply that i’m “excited” about defending necrophilia

this is such a bizarre perspective

if someone is murdered and their body sexually assaulted after they have died, do we disregard the latter act because “nobody was hurt”?

if we can reasonably assume someone would not want have someone to have sex with their dead body, wouldn’t having sex with their body be a violation of their consent, or does the notion of a living person’s consent lose all value when they die?

what about those who fetishize necrophilia because they like the idea of a nonresisting, totally malleable target who cannot fight back or say no? I mean, I’ve seen magazines where people make dummies that look like the corpses of celebrities and pose them sexily, ffs. Dehumanization/fetishization of the dead cannot occur without some dehumanization/fetishization of the living. Do you not see how intimately this is tied in with rape culture, a real thing that hurts actual living people? The OP was merely pointing out that act, separated from its context, is more stigmatized, not that it never hurts anyone ever.

My daughter wasn’t bullied to death, she was disappointed to death. Disappointed in people she thought she could trust, her school, and the police. She was my daughter, but she was your daughter too. For the love of God do something.
Glen Canning, father of Rehtaeh Parsons • In a new op-ed/statement published by the Huffington Post on Thursday. Parsons died on Sunday night, following a suicide attempt which is believed to have been the result of extensive post-rape bullying. Be warned, while we definitely think more people should see the grieving father’s words, you won’t find an easy read behind the source link. source (via shortformblog)

(via will-graham-i-am)

like, okay, if you’re really committed to some bullshit hand-wringing “harm happens and we don’t condemn anything” philosophy and you’re somehow not actually a rapist yourself, fine, I’m not going to waste time trying to convince you otherwise, but maybe you should consider staying very, very far away from people who have experienced harm??? what good do you think you’re doing them

I am going through a friend’s notes for a workshop on “transformative justice/sexual assault”, and I want to beat the shit out of the workshop leaders holy fuck, it’s just a big mess of “if you hold rapists accountable you are supporting the prison-industrial complex and are also responsible if they get arrested and convicted and raped in prison, btw their feelings are just as important as those of the people they raped, haven’t we all done bad things after all?”

Direct quote:

harm happens and we don’t condemn anything

jesus wept

This unholy marriage of rape culture with the cult of forgiveness means that some people forget that actions should, and do, have consequences for very good reason. Certainly, there are issues with the American criminal justice system (alternatively, the prison-industrial complex). No doubt, forgiveness on the part of victims of horrendous crimes is sometimes helpful to them in their healing process. None of that erases the need to hold people accountable for their actions, and in the case of Steubenville, there is no dearth of documentation proving that a great wrong did not simply occur, but was actively committed by people sure that their actions would never be taken to task. How else to explain the lack of shame, the creation and sharing of evidence proving the crime, the sheer arrogance expressed in said evidence?

Though punishment is not always a deterrent at all, let alone the best deterrent, allowing for the forgiveness narrative to allow people who commit staggeringly heinous crimes to walk away does not exactly send the right message to those who believe themselves to be above the law, or even basic respect for others’ humanity, agency, and bodily autonomy. Most people behave with common decency because they are commonly decent, but they’re not the ones about whom we have to worry.

A couple of years MAC did a collaboration with Rodarte, which was pretty fucking tasteless, to say the least, allegedly inspired by the ~ethereal landscape~ of the West Texas border region and included products with names like “Juarez” and “Factory”. Juarez is, of course, most famous internationally for the large number of women who have been murdered there, many of whom were employed in maquiladoras. MAC eventually withdrew the collection entirely and donated $100,000 to an organization to aid the women of Juarez; I’m not sure what Rodarte did, besides offer a lukewarm apology.

Anyway, the reason I bring this up is because when the MAC collaboration with Rihanna, someone actually said that RiRi Hearts MAC was as tasteless a move on MAC’s part as the Juarez collection. This was buried in a lot of other concern trolling about abuse victims that was and is occurring everywhere (this person was on specktra, but I don’t doubt other people have said the same thing).

What are we, tasteless, badly behaved, oversexed survivors too tacky for compassion, to make of this comparison?

1. Rihanna actually died that night and is now risen again to exploit her own death (Lipstick Lazarus effect).

2. Hundreds of dead Mexican women can be reduced to a single, poorly thought-out emotional appeal used to justify the dehumanization of another woman of color who is not behaving the way we think she should.

3. Both Rihanna and the women of Juarez are just metaphors; metaphors have no needs, emotions, or thoughts of their own, but cosmetic companies should not be so tasteless as to employ them.

4. Rihanna is a tragedy; the fact that she is still alive, still vibrant, still fighting, still being successful, is not something other victims of domestic violence can appreciate, because after all she is acting far too much like a victim of domestic violence, and that is repugnant.

5. There is no difference between dead women and live women, women who were murdered and women who are making their own choices; if you disapprove of how they live/die, they are taboo. Call it respect, but of course you mean respect for your own feelings, not respect for the women involved. (It’s about bad taste, literally no one relates to these women as if they are human beings.)

6. If you are not a Good Victim, you must be part of the problem.

7. If you are not a Good Victim, you must not be a person.

8. If you are not a person, you must eternally seek redemption and the forgiveness of anyone who demands it.

9. If you were victimized but are not a person and not seeking redemption, you must be that which victimizes you, and perhaps other people too.

10. Rihanna actually died that night, and what has risen is a monster undeserving of compassion or sympathy. Keep your wallets shut, say things that ward people like her away, make them feel less human so they will realize they are, in fact, less human, claim it is for their own good, they have no business feeling normal, they have no business living as though they have the right to emotions, mistakes, complexity, you know what’s best, and it’s not letting monsters like that into the light.

All very logical, based in love.

and the OTHER thing I had feelings about today is that today MAC announced that it is doing a makeup collection with Rihanna, and every fucking place I went to read about it was full of comments from sanctimonious wastes of carbon who announced (without a hint of irony!) that they just cared too much about victims of domestic violence to support Rihanna, who is obviously a bad role model, a bad decision maker, an ally to a bad man, a user of bad drugs, and speaker of bad words, a wearer of bad clothes, a bad, bad victim who failed to meet their strict guidelines for sympathy and who is therefore a pariah forever more

they just care about the issue of domestic violence so much, their love is too pure to be tainted by the likes of her

i just wish them all bodily harm, I do




tw rape/abuse



i will never understand people who think that women can and do just go around accusing men of rape whenever they want to get a dude back for something


if I wanted to fuck with you, I’d key your car or…

I’m not saying it’s logical. I’m not saying it’s common. I’m just saying I’ve seen about three instances of this actually happening. Luckily for the men involved, nobody believed the girl saying it (two were known to lie more than breathe, and the other had severe credibility issues thanks to heavy drug use), and witnesses came forward who had overheard these girls discussing their plans before their accusations.

1. Someone having a history of drug use doesn’t mean that they’re unrapeable. You know who has a history of drug use? Me, and like, a good chunk of the other rape survivors I know.

2. How does discussing the fact that they wanted to accuse someone before accusing them make them less credible, do you expect survivors to stay absolutely silent until the moment they walk into a police station? What is wrong with you.

However, the problem in each situation that no one believed the girl saying it.

Including you, by your own admission because they were EWW DIRTY DRUG USERS etc! Way to go! Seriously how are you not seeing that you are part of the problem, why are you going out of your way to talk about BUT THIS ONE TIME I KNEW THESE GIRLS WHO WERE TOTALLY LYING, what is wrong with you

What if they actually had been, and no one would listen? No matter how it works out, the cultural mindset that is shown in these situations is fucking disturbing and wrong on so very many levels. The times when false reports are issued with the intent to hurt reputations show a complete disregard for the severity of the thing they are lying about. They feed irrational biases against belief in cases of actual rape.

no. You know what feeds irrational biases against survivors? Misogyny. Racism. Classism. The idea that some people are inherently untrustworthy and “asking for it” because of things they’ve done in the past, because of their race, because of their class status, because of their gender, etc. The idea that all women should be treated as crazy liars because one time some dude totally knew a woman who was a crazy lair. False accusations of rape are statistically so insignificant that calling them part of the systemic problem of rape culture and victim blaming is ridiculous - especially so when your own reasons for accusing people of making false accusations are loaded with victim-blaming logic.

If you really know of someone who made a false accusation, you - and everyone else - can CHOOSE whether or not you let that affect the way you see rape victims and treat accusations of rape. Don’t blame the huge, systemic societal biases THAT YOU ARE PERPETUATING RIGHT NOW on a handful of extremely rare, isolated incidents. Take some fucking responsibility for your own attitude and actions and the consequences of the shit that plays into. Stop telling rape survivors - LIKE ME, incidentally - that the reason no one (ie you) won’t believe us is because one time this dirty drug using bitch totally lied about it. Then maybe we can have an honest discussion about false accusations. Until then, shut up.

The disinclination of those around the “liar” to believe them is seen as a positive thing to those who “know the truth” (in that it protects people who have theoretically done no wrong), but it is a very negative thing because (unless there were witnesses in the room) nobody knows what really happened. The “liar” could just as easily be a victim coerced against their will by someone the general public refused to believe capable of such a thing. It’s horrific all around and it wrecks lives.

I have never met someone whose life was wrecked by an accusation of rape, but whatever. Don’t let that stop you from dismissing rape survivors out of prejudice and then patting yourself on the back for paying lip service to more progressive notions of survivor autonomy, even as you derail a discussion about survivors to claim that you’ve totally witnessed false accusations in action.

tl;dr, look at your life, look at your choices.






so fucked up. Now bear with me - this is the Daily Mail so they won’t be the most feminist in covering this, but it is agreed that this is an effed up situation.

The nine-year-old girl who gave birth in Mexico will never have another child after she was sterilized by the doctors who delivered her baby - against her family’s wishes, it was revealed today.

The youngster was given the procedure following the shock delivery without the consent of her own mother.

She has now reported the Zoquipan Hospital in Guadalajara to the local human rights commission which is investigating.

I hope something good comes of this. No one deserves to have their reproductive rights violated - even if they’ve given birth at 9. Unacceptable.

Also kind of surprised this hasn’t been given more attention in the feminist news cycle.

Wow. Absolutely, unrepentantly inexcusable. America has a sick history of doing this to women of color as well, but it’s still shocking to see it happening today - especially to a 9-year-old girl. Sick.

So not only did this 9-year-old child give birth after being raped - because under no circumstances can a 9-year-old consent to sex - she will never have another opportunity to have children because of a second horrible violation. Wow. 

I feel genuinely sick.

This is so despicable.

I ended up in an argument with a coworker about this girl’s abuser. She insisted on calling him her boyfriend. No; you don’t have a “relationship” with a CHILD. 

I read an update about how the child’s father was proven to be her stepfather.  How fucking horrible is it that this girl’s only child is a product of incest? How about fucking sterilizing the abuser instead of the victim, huh? I guess that would never go over, because oh! It was just a mistake. Bla bla bla. I want to hit things. JFC.

in addition to what’s already been pointed out, this is a good example of how children of color and children in counties viewed as “less developed” are often spoke about like adults at a very young ages, resulting in the acquittal of the abuser

(though describing the baby as “a product of incest” and lamenting the fact that the stigma on said infant will never be alleviated by the production of untainted siblings is also pretty gross - the infant is also a victim of this situation)

(via dignified-and-old)

Asker Anonymous Asks:
speaking of ageism and rape culture, think of that george carlin bit every idiot who thinks rape is funny always quotes. RAPE CAN TOTALLY BE FUNNY, THINK OF A 90 YEAR OLD WOMAN GETTING RAPED LOLOLOL or whatever. too disgusted to look up the actual quote. but yeah, anyone who isn't a young thin woman is apparently impossible to rape because they should just ~be thankful anyone wants to touch their disgusting bodies~
desliz desliz Said:

Rape Culture Rules:

1. you’re not attractive and thus you should be thankful anyone wanted to fuck you

2. you’re so ugly we feel sorry for your rapist

3. you’re so disgusting you are not human and thus your assault is absurd and comical

which all revolve around the notion that the rapist is the real human and rape the humanizing force, therefore when rape occurs to people who are marked as less-than it’s not a crime, it’s charity (and how dare you be revulsed by charity?)