Straight privilege is not about how much sex you have.
Straight privilege is not about the amount of sexual attraction you experience.
Straight privilege is not about how kinky you are.
Straight privilege is not about how you don’t identify with other hetero people.
Straight privilege is not about if you have more than one partner at once.
Straight privilege is not about the amount of romantic attraction you experience.
Straight privilege is not even about whether or not you identify as straight.
Straight privilege is not about how you, like, totally aren’t homophobic.
Straight privilege is not about that one time you stood up for your gay friend.
Straight privilege is not about you having that gay friend.
Straight privilege is about the privileges afforded to people who are not attracted to members of their own gender.
Frida Kahlo and Her Dogs by Gisèle Freund, 1948
Both subject and photographer are eligible to be featured here.
warning: aversion and conversion therapies
I’m fucking tired of Internet ace objections to the fact that homophobic institutions would prefer all queer people to be asexual. No, they don’t just want us to not act on desires - when they have historically hooked queers up to machines that deliver electric shocks or force them to drink ipecac syrup to make queers precognitively associate their attractions with pain or puking their fucking guts out, no, they want the core attraction itself to be gone. They don’t just want us to be celibate - when the LDS church recently decided that being “homosexual” is okay if you remain celibate, it was considered progress by many people. Why do you think there are still scumbags practicing reparative therapy on children that tries to reshape BOTH their behavior and desires into “gender-appropriate” ones? Jesus fucking christ, talk about straightsplaining something you know nothing about.
as someone who does peer support for other queer folks, I can say from experience that this aversion therapy bullshit actually still happens to queer people. (hence the trigger warning added).
But, yeah. This is what I mean when I keep saying that it’s not as simple as “[non-asexual] = the majority = privileged” and “asexual = the minority = disprivileged”, and there needs to be room for [non-asexual] folks to express frustration, anger, and hurt in these discussions. Asexuality has a specific history in the oppression of queer people based on their (our) queer sexualities.
one of my classmates’s parents plucked him out of high school, where he was doing phenomenally—a gifted flautist and all-around dedicated student—and sent him to a-/conversion camp, and we’re from what is considered a gay-friendly city. my girlfriend, 22, packed her belongings in secret and ran away from home, crossed the state line, because her parents were ready to bring her to the same, and she hasn’t been back there since
a-/conversion therapy’s ultimate goal is Kinsey-0 straightness, but failing that, asexuality is a close, close second, and they’ll be more than happy to create that. they think it’s way better than being a fucking queer! and that is why LGB people are displeased with the way we are lumped in with straight people as “sexuals” and/or “The [Sexual] Ruling Majority.” do you even go here? libidinous straightness-queerness-asexuality is not a, pardon, straight-line, A to B to C scenario of increasingly oppressive combined individual-collective minority experiences, the issues LGB people face are distinct from issues faced by het and aromantic asexuals, you can continue to stay away from how we reclaim the slurs aimed at us
but lol what’s an LGB asexual imperative?
TW rape, corrective rape
Are you asexual? No? Then you can’t talk.
you’re not an oppressed class, so this doesn’t really work!
furthermore, why exactly do people who aren’t queer get to weigh in on how they should be allowed to steal our identity?
When someone rapes or tries to rape a male asexual on the basis of his asexuality, to “cure” him or to show him that he’d like it with the “right” person, that’s certainly not misogyny. When someone coerces or makes a male asexual take hormones to “cure” him, that’s certainly not misogyny.
rape culture, hth
Wow, no, Party Soft. Corrective rape of an asexual man is not just rape culture. It’s fucking sexual privilege, where if you’re not having sex or don’t want sex, then you are fucking broke and obviously forcing you to have sex can fix it! In the context of rape of asexuals in relationships, it’s also sexual privilege where the rapist, no matter their gender, feels entitled to sex from their partner. Fuck you, what is wrong with you? Seriously, what is your problem?
two premises that are part of rape culture:
1. healthy men are always-already ready for sex. any man who is not, for any reason, is broken. or lying.
2. a fundamental disregard for consent that supports a person’s entitlement to another person’s body.
none of what you described is unique to asexuals. and I am disturbed that you lot are trying to use rape as a battering ram or a trump card.
Reblogging to add that rape of men is indeed quite strongly related to misogyny. Consider this; patriarchy could not persist without cooperation from the majority of society. A man who does not engage in violence against women or those groups perceived as dangerously feminized is a man who represents potential weakness in the system. This is why little boys are bullied for liking “girly things”, this is why straight men are constantly policing each other with words like “fag”, this is why the phrase “pussy-whipped” exists. Men must ensure that other men are cooperating, and in some cases this can result in sexual violence to make sure the victim understands what is expected of him. Prison rape is an excellent example; sexual violence is not only common but expected; men within the prisons use it to establish who is “weak” and who is “strong”, and society thinks this is perfectly okay, even humorous, because hey, they’re prisoners, they must’ve done something to deserve it. In a similar vein, a man who demonstrates no sexual desire is A) not doing his patriarchal duty in using sex as a weapon and method of control; B) possibly homosexual. Bear in mind that it is still extremely rare for an adult male to be sexually assaulted for simply not being “sexual”; the actual motivations often have a lot more to do with homophobic suspicions about men with low sex drives and no apparent interest in pursuing women.This system is not beneficial to “sexual” men who do not wish to exploit their partners, and is of absolutely no benefit to women whatsoever, since women are viewed as inherently rapeable, regardless of their interest in sex. And do we even need to go into how consensual sexual activity and ones’ participation in it has absolutely nothing to do with rape?